UnSeenXposure

.:HIV, Aids & Other Std’s:.

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 20:34:34 GMT

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Have you ever met someone who has changed your life within moments simply describing to you their journey of life.
I have. And he remained a very close friend of mine until he died of complications dealing with the HIV virus. You see
most people take unprotected sex as a joke never viewing or understand the effects HIV, Aids and other Std’s can have on
your life. Never comprehending that if they would’ve simply used a condom they wouldn’t be where they are. But with
these diseases does come true wisdom so anyone who is HIV+ or has full blown Aids or has even been effected by an Std of
any kind know that right here you have a true support of the great fight to better this world.

.:Love Making:.

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 20:30:21 GMT

Sex is just sex, right . People seem to look at sex so ignorantly. With all intercourse there is some type of emotional
connection. True love making is indescribable passion with an unbreakable emotional connection. Its felt from the heart.
Its not simply about have that orgasm and calling it a day. But we all do choose are own paths anyhow. If only people would
understand the destruction it can cause.

Me being the Virgin I am loves to talk about this topic. HAHAHA!!

.:Relationships:.

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 20:27:31 GMT

I cant stress more how every relationship must have flaws. See people always have this idea that they can create
a perfect relationship and as much as I’d enjoy that it’s far from being true. First and foremost there is no such
thing as perfect. It’s just a word man created so they can dream that one day they may live a life this way. More
importantly love isn’t finding a perfect person, it’s seeing an imperfect person perfectly.

.:Love:.

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 19:54:58 GMT

Love..Wow truly where do I begin. I’ve been someone lucky enough to encounter love. Its just so unexplainable. Previously
I tried my best to explain love and all that it may contain, but in every situation it is different. Love can be so many
emotions and thoughts I honestly say I cant describe it to anyone.

There is also another aspect of love in my opinion, in which I’ve never shared with others...Often love turns into pain.
Whether it is the love of family, friends, or a lover often people abuse the power of being loved by you and can quickly
turn into your enemy. Secrets, lies, abuse and many other things can destroy something care for so deeply.

.:Life:.

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 19:53:35 GMT

With all that said and done I now choice to share with each of you my views on life. The purpose of this expression
is simply so each of you have future understanding of myself & my lifestyle.

As a child do you remember watching cartoons and thinking to yourself how much you wish you could fly, but truthfully
knowing that was all unreal? Well as odd as this may seem life is much like a cartoon. There are bad guys and good guys.
The bad guys making life more difficult and violent everyday. While the good guys simply live life the best way they
possibly can. The bad envy the good so they bring them down in society. Then they are normal people who fit in between
this all. People who have characteristics of both types of people. I myself am a normal person. Understanding how it feels
to be a bad guy but also understanding how it is to be a good guy I simply fall in the category of the normal.

UnSeenXposure

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 19:40:37 GMT

I am a young lesbian minority living in the mean streets of Bridgeport, simply striving to be the best I can be.
After all living in the ghetto achieving your dreams isn’t easy, is it? Life is complex for all to some degree. Most
people don’t understand this due to the stereotypes in which we are all placed in. After all I’m just the bitch who
lives by the projects. I’m confused about my lifestyle and what males can offer me, right!?! WRONG!! Its funny because
for a long time in my life I didn’t want to be me. Being a homosexual is far to difficult. Endlessly wishing I was someone
else, hell maybe even you .Until one day I came to the understanding that no matter how bad life may seem, no matter what
outstanding obstacles we are faced with there is always worse then what we are going through. And with all that said, I’ve
come to this. My world of expression and thoughts on life and all it contains. You see livejournal has allowed me to be
the real me. Meeting people who showed me outstanding courage to be my true self helped me to exit that secret life I lived.
For I was truly living two lives. One simply being a Puerto Rican Tease living like a “player” playing those so called
"gangstas". And the other was crying deep inside knowing I was unhappy because that was just a facade and truthfully I was
a closet case. So I let that go and decided to let my story be known. So here I am today known to you as UnSeenXposure living
life to the best I can and trying my best to be happy.

..Prostituded Luv..

Thu, 01 Dec 2005 16:10:51 GMT

I was thinking about her today. Kinda weird since she's always running through my head. It annoys me. HIGHLY!!
I've been thinking about if I should get into a relationship with her or not, but no answer really comes into
my head. Let's look at the pros and cons.

Pro's:
~I'll always be satistfied.
~I know she's willing to do anything for me.
~She'll love me unconditionally.
~I can control her just by a look.

Cons:
~She's a heartless bitch!
~She's a liar.
~She's a cheater.
~She has a goddamn baby who she mourns for now. Weird though I feel no remorse, real piss off huh?

Got to go Lunch awaits..

..::Intervention::..

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 20:04:59 GMT

Well, it's been a while and you know what, I dont miss it anymore then I should. Love is overrated, and I thrive of the
heartbreak. I'm a cold, heartleass bitch because I feel no sorrow for the loss of her, it just kills me to know that I
was basically forced into the relationship. She didn't stand up for anything "real." I believe she just used me as a cause
to finally fight her mom.

..::Silence of the The Broken-Hearted::..

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 20:55:11 GMT

Me and my ex are talking again. I'm pist off cause I promised myself I wouldn't, she sent me some pics, and I think I've
been lying to myself about not loving her anymore. As soon as I saw the pictures, my heart dropped, and I realized how much
I missed her. *Sigh*

This is her:

Isn't she gorgeous???

..::Hurting Sucks::..

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 15:11:57 GMT

My ex is sitting next to me and it's kind of annoying cause she's watching me type this, I just want to take a knife and stab her lol.

Newest pic of her, I took it last night:

Tuning my guitar

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 04:10:16 GMT

So I get my guitar and I'm tuning it and everything right and I'm just about done when the phone rings. So I put my guitar
down and go pick it up. This is how the conversation goes:
Me:Hello
Unknown: Hey, is there a girl named May-ra around?
Me: Yes, indeed, this is her, who is this?
Unknown: Listen, bitch, I heard that you were talking to my man. I don't like when little hoes like you be all up on a taken
nigga..
Me: Ummm.... What would I want with your man? I'm...
Her: My man looks good that's why!
Me: Well, I'm not into people with third legs.
Her: Oh, you think this is a fucking joke bitch!
Me: No seriously I dont like dudes.
Her: What you trying to say that you some faggot, some coochie biter?
Me: Yep!
Her: Oh my god,I'm so sorry
Me: It's ok, happens a lot.
Her: Well bye.
Me: (hang up) Dumbass bitch!

So I go back to tuning my guitar...

..::Thanks Leslie and Samantha (And Angel)::..

Fri, 11 Nov 2005 03:14:23 GMT

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-----Dear Unknown
I need to get this off my chest
You see, I have an issue
I'd like to get it out somehow
But I don't want to be judged by you
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
Tell me dear, what is wrong?
What's on your mind?
That has gotten you so down?
A solution we shall find
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
The problem is I've been hurt
Touched in the wrong places
But I'm too scared to tell
I can picture the looks on peoples faces
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
I won't judge you for what's been done
In me, you can confide
I will listen to your fears
Talk to me angel, don't hide
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
It's been going on for years
I just want the pain to go away
I don't want him to touch me
At night, to God, I pray
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
You can't go on like this
I can feel the pain in your words
You must put an end to it
Let your voice be heard
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
I can't tell anyone, you see
Because I know he is sorry
He didn't mean to do this
He didn't want to hurt me
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
You must tell someone now
Before it gets any worse
For his bad deeds
He should be cursed
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
It can't get worse than it already is
The pain just won't go away
I just want to pretend it never happened
But the bad thoughts always stay
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
You can't put yourself through that pain
You must talk to someone who can help
I care about you, and I'm here
Do this for me, if not for yourself
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
He didn't mean to hurt me though
And see, this is my fault
I could've stopped his sooner
Everything is my fault
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
Don't talk like that angel
There's nothing you could've done
Face your problems, raise your voice
And one day you'll see the sun
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
It is my fault though
I could've screamed louder
There is lots I could've done
I could've kicked harder
-----Signed, The Forgotten One

-----Dear The Forgotten One
You were but a child
Didn't know right from wrong
Now you're old enough to get help
You just have to be strong
-----Signed, Someone Who Cares

The forgotten one never replied
Much to the caring persons fear
Wondering if she was OK
Throughout all the years

One day they got a letter
No address and unmarked
Opened it to find the story
Of a journey the young girl had embarked

-----Dear Someone Who Cares
Thanks for all you have done
You made me see I have to be strong
And I couldn't never thank you enough
You saved me, thanks again, so long
-----Signed, The One You Saved

..::Who invited copiers anyways?!?::..

Fri, 11 Nov 2005 01:31:21 GMT

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So I write this for my english class and leave the paper on my desk thinking the teacher will pick it up. I leave and
go to a G.S.A. meeting, and what happens...30 minutes later some girl comes up to me with a piece of paper and is like
have you read this. So ME being nosey, takes it and starts reading, then I start screaming. My paper had been photo copied
by a girl in my class dozens of times and sent around the school as if it were some chain letter. Then this girl who
constantly gets on my nerves who forever has her tities out like she think she cute, said she wrote it and started taking
credit for it. I was damn well near tears. To top it off my teacher got a copy and when I explaing it to her, she thought
I was lying so I got a zero for my creative writing entry. Anyways since the essays been everywhere peep it:

There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you:
LET THEM WALK I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring
about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

If you’re still holding that phone, hang it up! That person has walked away from you on their own, meaning they didn’t
want to stay.. DON’T BEG!

When people can walk away from you: LET THEM WALK Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The bible said
that, “They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us:
but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us..” [1 John 2:19] KJV

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can’t make them stay. Let them
go.

And it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in your story is over. And you’ve got to
know when people’s part in your story is over, so that you don’t keep trying to raise the already dead. You’ve got to
know when it’s dead. You’ve got to know when it’s over.

Let me tell you something. I’ve got the gift of good-bye. It’s the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It’s not
that I’m hateful, it’s that I’m faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to
have, He’ll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don’t need it.

Stop begging people to stay. LET THEM GO!

If you are holding on to something that doesn’t belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to.
LET IT GO!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains... LET IT GO!

If someone can’t treat you right, love you back, and see your worth...LET IT GO!

If someone has angered you ... LET IT GO!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge. LET IT GO!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship, addiction, or something you know God doesn‘t approve of. LET IT GO!!!
Think of it this way will that thing you’re involved with be able to make it to Heaven? Will it? No, huh…. LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents.... LET IT GO!

If you have a bad attitude...LET IT GO!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is telling you over and over
"take your hands off of it," then you need to... LET IT GO!!!

..::Hurting Sucks::..

Sun, 06 Nov 2005 16:50:54 GMT

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HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHICH HURTS THE MOST.... SAYING SOMETHING AND WISHING YOU HADN`T, OR SAYING NOTHING AND
WISHING YOU HAD?

Well I fucked up, and didn't say anything.... Sorry...

..::Ripped Shredded and Bleeding::..

Sat, 29 Oct 2005 16:58:02 GMT

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This is to the girl who has made love patient, kind and honest. This is to the girl who even though she got treated
like crap, she stood by her all the way because she always thought "Love was stronger than that". This is to the girl
who woke up everyday praying to god her woman would soon treat her better. This is to the girl who got disrespected over
the littlest crap, to the girl who got humiliated in front of tons of people, to the girl who got her esteem put low, so
low that she feels like nobody now. This is to the girl, the girl who cried day and night, the girl who gave up her dreams,
who gave up her friends.. and most of all her life. This is to the girl that got treated like nothing but a puta, bitch..
This is for the girl who was alone, but was there. Who stopped pursuing her dreams.. all because she loved her, all because
her woman always promised. This is to the girl...

..::DiSgUsTeD and ApAlLeD::..

Thu, 27 Oct 2005 23:18:38 GMT

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OKAY!! I hear we, Ricans, brag about how we are the superior Latino "nationality"truth be told is that we are
the lowest Latino "nationality" in the socio-economic ladder. Why you may ask? Well just look at the history of
Puerto Rico. In essence, the last time P.R. was independent was when it was still named Borinquen. Before that
Bisexual Spaniard stumbled onto its shores.

So next time you ignorant, cornrows, whitewashed, Moreno wanna-be’s, diss Mexicans for looking "Indian," remember
that the last time P.R. was independent, was when it was run by "Indios." In essence, the "Post-Columbus" history
is this-----Puerto Rico went from being a Spanish colony into an American colony (due to the Spanish-American war
which was started under false pretenses, much like present day Iraq war). So think of Puerto Rico as a hooker that went
from one pimp to another.

So if the land of where we, "Boricuas," originate from does not have a true identity, then what makes that of us. We
who are so quick to dismiss true musicians like Hector Lavoe and swing from Daddy Yankee’s nut sack. Puerto Ricans lacks
independence and forget its true roots to build a foundation on. We are so willing to forget about our Taino ancestors and
always are quick to say "Yeah I’m white, black and Native American" when in reality you are a confused genetic freak who
gets cornrows, hangs with other “boricuas,” and hate Morenos, but love acting like a Tyrone.

Let’s not forget about the Rican ho’s who love getting green/hazel/gray contacts and dye their hair BLOND. Rican ho’s
always want to look white, but act black.

So the history of Puerto Rico is to steal, the same way Borinquen was stolen by the Spanish and then the Americans.
That is why stealing comes natural to us. So we are so quick to steal the Cuban flag and their music and claim it as
ours. We are so quick to steal Spanish reggae from panama, put a hip-hop rhythm to it and rename it "reggeaton" And
then steal mambo from Cuba, and call it “Salsa,” claim it as our own.

I am sure the ghosts of Tito Puente and Hector Lavoe must be pissed each time Daddy Yankee lunchboxes and notebooks are
sold. I am sure they wanted "reggeaton" to represent Puerto Rico instead of mambo. So is this ignorance and lack of
identity of us as a people that makes us want to put a statue of Cristobal Colon in San Juan Bay. That is the equivalence
of the Jews erecting a statue of Hitler in the middle of Israel.

So we are so quick to celebrate the 4th of July Independence day. I’snt that like a domestic violence victim celebrating
her Beater’s birthday? And we even take it a step further and put on their uniform and die in some foreign land in the name
of "democracy." the same "democracy" that brought us "operation bootstrap" and turned ‘La Isla del Encanto’ into a third-
world colony.

We are so quick to represent Puerto Rico and represent our "nationality" when Puerto Rico is not a country and
therefore Puerto Rican is not a nationality. We are so quick to hang the Puerto Rican flag (stolen from Cuba) on
the porch of the house we rent from some old Jew.

So everywhere we go we put "our" flag up as if we just discovered that apartment we live in. in order for something
to be discovered it was to be lost. and we as a people are lost, We truly need to be discovered.

So are we superior than other Latinos that come to the U.S, without papers and within one generation they own a piece
of the American dream? We are so quick to diss immigrants and their green cards. yet we gave up our nation’s independence
for a housing voucher, food stamps and a guest spot on the Richard Bey or Maury Povich show. We diss Mexicans and
Dominicans and anyone who needs a green card, yet all get got to show for our American citizenship is a GED and those
spinning rims on our Honda Accord (Money that should of be going towards child support).

And then we hate Morenos. Now I know that God has a sense of humor, he made Puerto Rico`s two greatest athletes
black (Clemente and Trinidad).-------I could just go on and on with my thesis--

..::Crack, Crack, Break::..

Thu, 27 Oct 2005 22:13:53 GMT

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*I am stubborn/*I love being right/*I make no apologies for the fact that I demand attention/*I tend to think of others
before myself/*I like Cinnamon Buns/*I love chocolate milk/*I think Ketchup was the best thing invented!/*I don’t like sushi,
liver or grapefruit/*I love cooking/*I love my friends/*I have the most off the hook homies!/*I wish it were summer all year
long/*I believe friends are a necessity/*I have very little tolerance/*I’m difficult/*I pride myself on NOT taking the easy
way out/*I want to be creative/*I find it difficult to create/*I think Beyonce has the most "off the hook" voice/*I dream of
perfection, but I am imperfect/* I spend money faster than I make it/*I hate makeup, but I like being made-up/*I cannot
tolerate strong smells too much/*I listen to every kind of music out there/*I love being musically inclined, but I can’t get
enough reggeaton/*I’ve bungee jumped and even hopped a BIG ASS fence 10 or 15 times in my life (lol)/*I rarely know how to
express myself/*I tend to speak before I filter things out in my mind, which sometimes leads to talking wreck less/*I am jealous
but in a nonchalant kind of way/*My favorite channels are the Discovery channel, history channel, and Court T.V. /*I loooooove
80`s movies, and I am addicted to documentaries and MTV reality shows/*I love to nap, but sometimes I use it as an escape/*I
survived my childhood and past relationships- (I pat myself on the back everyday)/*I often forget that some people have been
through what I’ve been through, and sometimes worse/*I don’t feel like I’m short, I’m just not tall/*I have dreams that can
never be, and dreams that are close to being/*I can’t sleep with the closet door open, DVD light on or clothes on the bedroom
floor/*I’m just getting to know myself, my mind, my direction in life and I love it/*I remind myself to be friends with the
person, and not the idea/*I’m non-judgmental and will NEVER, I REPEAT NEVER do my friends dirty again!/*My shadow is the only
one I trust 100%/I laugh and joke about everything/*There’s nothing like a good sense of humor/*I question my own questions/*I
change my mind a million times/*I’m always debating something in my mind/*I’m always thinking/*I’m constantly late and probably be
late to my own funeral/*I’m sensitive/emotional, but this wall around me will not let you see that side/*I’m not easily
impressed/*I look and think ahead too, too much, but am often drawn back/*I love people who are different, but can relate
to me/*I have NO kids, but I love them/*I stopped caring about what society thinks about me/*Your full of shit to me, before I
label you genuine (which takes a while)!

~~> *Me in a nutshell* <~~

..::Suffering in Silence::..

Wed, 26 Oct 2005 01:47:25 GMT

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A teenaged boy shoves Casey into a wall outside of there high school. “Lesbo,” He hisses at her. “Why aren’t your
faggot bodyguards here to protect you queer,” the boy's friends laugh at his remarks. The boys beat the girl and
leave her bloody and crying on the ground. Months later unable to deal with the daily torture Casey hangs herself
in her closet..

Every day on his way home from school Chris is beat by a group of gay hating boys. One day they brought baseball
bats and beat the poor boy to death because he was gay..

Linda’s new home is a mental ward. She was sent there after silting her wrists because she couldn’t stand the abuse
any longer..

Grace has changed schools 5 times because she is harassed at every school..

Cassie dropped out of high school in the end of freshmen year after she was raped by a boy that said he was turning
her straight..

A senior is sent to the principal’s office for hitting a boy that called her a "dyke". She explained to her principal
that the boy had been harassing her everyday since freshmen year and she had come to the office again and again but
nothing ever happened. She was expelled..

Lisa doesn’t have friends anymore because they all found out that Lisa’s mom is a lesbian and they thought that her mother
would hit on them..

Terri was fired from her job because her boss found out she was a lesbian..

It may seem hard to believe but these are things that happen every day all across the country. 85% of gay/lesbian teens
that come out in high school will not live past graduation because of suicide and beatings. Life as a gay/lesbian person
is the hardest thing in the world. Especially because gay/lesbian teens who suffer in silence. Their cries for help fall
to deaf ears. People don’t hear the call until it's too late. Usually too late means, they're standing next to a coffin or
sitting in the hall or cafeteria having a memorial for the person that’s cries no one seemed to hear..

Gay/lesbian teens don’t just suffer from their classmates. Sometimes the families of gay/lesbian teens will put them
through an exorcism. An exorcism is done by a Minster and is a series of things done to a person that many people say
will turn them straight and turn them to God. I personally think that anyone who would go though this would hate God
afterwords. Things done to straighten a gay/lesbian person out aren’t usually done by just Minsters. Many times a boy or
a gang will rape a lesbian in hopes that the girl will like it and turn straight. Or vice-versa.

I wish the people that cause another to suffer would stop and think about what there doing. They don’t know what is
like to suffer, to be one of 'those' people. Think of the ones who get kicked out of the house. That loose their friends.
That have to go though exorcisms. Girls that get raped by boys trying to change them. The fact that many have their
lives taken away because in a fit of depression they slashed their wrists or swallowed pills or killed themselves in
some other way. I wish they could know or at least think of the many people that are suffering in the silence.

Part of me always feels like I will never know how truly blessed I am. I can walk with my head held high. I will always
have my friends. Yes, my mother hates the fact that I'm a Lesbian. Even though her opinion hurts me, I feel so lucky that
I have this life. I love being proud of who I am..

..::Death Before Dishonor::..

Tue, 25 Oct 2005 21:42:33 GMT

RESPECT. 7 Letters. 1 word. 1 meaning. Many different ways to get it. Its all in the way you represent and carry yourself.
No one is just gonna give you respect. Sometimes you gotta earn it. Bitch. Trick. Hoe. Its all words I've used before. I'm
guilty. But I know how I've used them and I would never let anyone use that shit on me. "This girl, hunnie, chick." Forget
that. I got a name. Use it. Don`t classify me as someone from around the way. If I don`t know you, don`t TOUCH me. If you
respect yourself as much as you say Ladies. Why are ya'll half ass naked out on the street? So you can get a few holla's?
Don`t know about you. But I`d rather be special. I`d rather get no holla's than a bunch of holla's for all the wrong reasons.
I`d rather be single than be with a woman that`s only there to use me. Seriously Ladies. You are all queens. Don`t let no dude
or chick treat you like a peasant. Your bodies are temples. Cherish them. Many different ways to say it. Many different ways
to show it. 1 meaning. 1 word. 7 Letters. RESPECT.